Ship Arriving Too Early to Avert a Drowning Liver

A quick perusal through the vast discography of Frank Zappa will reveal the inspiration for the title of this blog. Yes indeed, Brewslut and I were off to yet another concert by Frank's son, Dweezil. I'd been going to see him ever since he started the Zappa Plays Zappa show back in 2006. Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure I haven't missed a tour yet. I'm good for at least one airing of Frank's mind-blowing catalog once a year (more if it was feasible, though). At any rate, a concert of course yields pre-gaming at a few breweries prior to showtime. Who wants to pay premium pricing for subpar beer at a venue? Not this guy!

The day began with a brewery I'd just discovered while poking around BeerMapping.com. Taking its namesake from the neighborhood of suburban Philadelphia in which it is situated, Chestnut Hill Brewing Company was in the midst of celebrating its first anniversary during our visit. I was familiar with the area only because there had been an Iron Hill location established there for quite some time, although we'd never been there before. Like many suburban Philly neighborhoods, Chestnut Hill boasts an abundance of tiny shops and boutiques along the main drag, where portions of the streets shift from asphalt to cobblestone (not comfortable to traverse but certainly pretty to look at). As we pulled into town, I made an off-the-cuff comment about a record store being close by, and - lo and behold! - there appeared one about half a block away on the right side of the street. Since it was national Record Store Day, Brewslut obliged with a quick visit. More on that later. Now, onto beer!

Chestnut Hill's brewery is situated in a delightful little market tucked away from the main street called Market at the Fairway. The narrow, stone alley leading back to the marketplace reminded me of our honeymoon trip to Paris, where we enjoyed a memorable 3-course luncheon at a quaint cafe on a similar alley in Chateaux country. Inside, the space was brimming with all types of city folk shopping for produce, chocolates, and baked goods, or enjoying lunch from one of the many vendors, including an on-site sushi kiosk! Then of course, there was the brewery, which happened to be just inside the main entrance to the right. 

We perused the chalkboard, which featured six beers on tap, so we decided we each have two pints and share them. I decided to begin with the aptly named One Year Anniversary Ale, a NE-style IPA with brewed with Simcoe, Citra and Centennial hops, flaked oats and wheat. This was an exemplary take on an overly trendy beer. As I've said countless times before, I hate seeing these IPAs everywhere but I can't help but order one whenever I see one available. Think of me as a one-man independent research firm conducting a nationwide taste test. Well, this one was a winner! As it should, this anniversary marked the occasion with a pleasant, citrus and tropical fruit-forward nose, soft, velvety body and minimal bitterness. Think soft and delicate with a full aroma... they way it should be. Brewslut was equally enjoying her pour of Hazed & Confused, an American Pale Ale dry-hopped with Mosaic and Citra. Can't go wrong with those two hop varieties. this one had a similar look and feel as my anniversary ale, but it was slightly more bitter and floral in the finish.

Happy anniversary from Pleeps!

We took a quick stroll around the marketplace while we enjoyed our first beers. I was eyeing up the nearby Barry's Buns, which was situated catty-corner from the seating area at the brewery. While I found the name of the establishment to be humorous, i must say that the food looked amazing. However, Brewslut guilt-tripped (fat-shamed?) me out of procuring one of Barry's insanely delicious-looking sticky buns. I guess I'll never be privy to the flavor of Barry's Buns. Sad panda.

Barry's Buns... I'm pretty sure they're finger lickin' good!

As we made our way back to the tiny bar, I noticed that the brewery was actually situated next door to the "tasting room" where we were sitting. See?

Next on the agenda was a pint of Poppy's Porter, a tasty dark beer cold brewed with 2 lbs. of Poppy’s Café House Blend coffee. (The Poppy's kiosk was conveniently situated a few paces away from the brewery.) This was another fine beer with just the right amount of coffee in the nose. The roastiness was a bit restrained due to the smooth nature of cold brew coffee. The body was firm and not overly viscous, which made this one an easy drinker. Brewslut went with a pour of Motra, a fantastic West Coast-style IPA hopped with Mosaic and Citra. While this had a similar hop character to the Hazed & Confused, the body, texture and appearance of this beer was textbook West Coast IPA. I made a comment that it was reminiscent of a Pizza Port IPA; not a particular IPA, but rather a dead ringer for something that might have been brewed by Pizza Port. I've since gone on record and professed that Pizza Port makes the best West Coast-style IPAs in the country, and lord knows I've had quite a lot of them over the years (thanks to many trips to San Diego). Motra, in my opinion, is one of the finest Wet Coast IPA clones I've had not only on the East Coast, but outside of San Diego! Perhaps it caught me in the right mood, but I just enjoyed the shit out of this beer and would have easily put down a pint of my own had we not had two other stops to make before the show.

All in all, I was more than impressed with our first visit to Chestnut Hill. They also scored bonus points for the ambiance of the market setting and "scenery" (i.e. people watching). NERD ALERT: We also enjoyed a conversation with a pair of locals about Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Rush. 

Next, a quick detour to do a bit of wax hunting. Since it was indeed Record Store Day, Brewslut allowed me to make an impromptu pop-in to a shop just up the street from the brewery. Hideaway Music was pretty small, so it only took about 20 minutes or so to plow through all of the vinyl bins. Brewslut helped by digging through the bargain bin, and was quick to call out bands she thought I'd be interested in. I found a lot of great stuff, but unfortunately this somewhat jaded collector already has most of it in his collection. Still, I was able to find a sweet NM copy of XTC's Beeswax: Some B-Sides 1977-1982, which was a nice addition to my collection. Even better, it was two bucks off for Record Store Day. I even got a free cloth tote with my purchase. I win!

Anyway, back to beer. It had been many years since we last set foot in the next stop on our agenda. As a matter of fact, it took many years to wash away the stigma of what we'd nicknamed "Earth Bread and Daycare" after our last visit with D&C. However, I was game to give them another try, especially since I recently learned that Earth Bread + Brewery was affiliated with the newish (and amazing) Brewery Techne and Bar Hygge situated over in the Spring Garden neighborhood of Philadelphia. 

Our view from the bar at Earth Bread + Brewery.

Perusing the chalkboard, I spotted a beer called Chainsmoker, and I immediately thought, "This HAS to be a smoked beer!" Indeed, my tingling Spidey-sense was spot-on: a German style Rauchbier. Twenty Eighteen is turning out to be the year of the Rauch for me. I've been bumping into them all over the place... and as a result driving them into my beer locker (that's my gut, for those who don't watch Trailer Park Boys). This one was a guest tap from Brewery Techne, but it's technically the same guy brewing the beer, as far as I know anyway. This one had a nice dark chestnut-colored hue and moderate smokey aroma. However, it was a bit thin overall. Still, I enjoyed the flavor but was hoping for something a bit more chewy on the palate. 

Brewslut, on the other hand, shot for the Lemon Maroon, hopped up steam beer/IPA hybrid with lemon zest. For those not familiar with a "steam" beer (sometimes referred to as California Common), it is a highly effervescent beer brewed by fermenting lager yeasts at warmer ale yeast fermentation temperatures. If you've had Anchor Steam (the benchmark of the style), then you know what I'm talking about. Grainy, moderately hoppy with a dry finish, this particular version boasted a zesty lemon tang as well. 

The Amazing Pleeps and his balancing act.

We concluded with a shared pour of Chimera, a Belgian style Dark Ale. This was preceded by an argument (the good kind) over the pronunciation of the name of the beer. Brewslut won, even with my long and storied Dungeons & Dragons background. I suppose teaching Mythology as an elective trumps the knowledge of a fantasy role playing nerd. This beer, while enjoyable, didn't really have too much character outside the candied stone fruit flavor of the Belgian yeast. And with that, we settled up and headed to our final destination before the concert.

Although I was familiar with the brewery and had a few of its beers in passing at numerous beer festivals over the years, Neshaminy Creek had pretty much eluded us. A quick visit to my trusty BeerMapping.com revealed its new Borough Brewhouse site and tasting room was conveniently located about two miles from the Keswick Theater. Given this fortunate geographical discovery, it was a no-brainer for our final stop before the concert. 

Inside Neshaminy Creek's new Borough Brewhouse.

Inside, the room was vast and inviting, with an open floor plan and a wrap-around bar as well as an upstairs loft area. Plenty of exposed brick walls, painted beer decor and high, beamed ceilings completed the ambiance, lending plenty of modern flair. We were meeting a friend shortly, but learned he was running a bit late, so we decided to park at the bar for a while.

The beer list was pretty impressive, with everything from lighter lagers and a variety of IPAs to an Imperial Stout and barrel-aged Belgian Quad. Given the vast selection, I was glad to see 7oz. pours on the menu. I feel that a half pint - give or take - is really the perfect amount of beer to sample, especially if it's a new beer for me. If you buy into a full pint, or even an Imperial Pint, and don't like the beer, then your stuck with it. Sample size glasses only allow you to scratch the surface and see if you like it enough to go big. But 7 to 8 ounces can give a complete snapshot of the beer. Plus you can try twice as many in one sitting! 

Oh, and guess what? Yup. Another smoked beer! Make that two smoked beers! Of the two listed on the menu, I was leaning toward Bacon Industry, a Helles Rauchbier brewed with bacon, and beechwood and cherrywood smoked malts. Now, folks who know me know that I refrain from eating swine. After all, pigs are smarter than dogs, and dogs are smarter than people. It's a long story that goes back to visiting one of the livestock pavilions at the Bloomsburg Fair. Let's just say I looked into a pig's eyes and connected with his soul. So, no bacon for me. However, my one self-imposed loophole is this: if there's a beer brewed with bacon, I shall drink it. Honestly, I've only ever encountered a minuscule amount of beers brewed with bacon in our travels; perhaps enough to count on one hand. This one was definitely on the smokier and "meatier" side of the spectrum. Had this been a big, thick porter or stout, I would have enjoyed it even more. But the crispness of the lager characteristics played nicely with its smokey attributes, which made for an enjoyable beer.

Who likes to Rauch the party? Pleeps likes to Rauch the party!

In the midst of all this, our friend Mike (bassist and keyboardist for my Rush tribute band, Solar Federation) joined us. Turns out the guy sitting next to us at the bar (also going to the show), had seen our band numerous times and knew who we were. I was pretty flabbergasted, to say the least. Getting recognized in Harrisburg is one thing, but in Philly? We chatted about music while we enjoyed our beers and the surroundings. 

Speaking of beer, up next was a big DIPA called The Shape of Hops to Come. Hopped with Apollo, Newport, Simcoe, Topaz, and Citra, this sucker had lots going on with it. On the surface, it was thick, sticky and rife with floral and citrus fruit in the nose. A bit deeper, and the pine resin and floral notes emerged. At 8.5% ABV (timid for a DIPA), the boozy warmth was minimal but present. This one definitely has more of a West Coast vibe, and the I appreciated the viscosity of the beer. All in all, not a bad DIPA. 

My view from the barstool at Borough Brewhouse.

For my last beer, I went all in. I wanted to make sure I was good and primed up for some Zappa (although Frank would certainly disapprove of any sort of inebriated state into which I may or may not have descended). Enter Barrel Aged Four Corners Quad. OK, I admit it. I'm a sucker for barrel-aged beers. This bad boy, a 12% ABV barrel-aged Belgian-style Quad brewed in collaboration with Against the Grain, was aged in Jack Daniels Rye Whiskey barrels for an undetermined amount of time. Man, this was like drinking vanilla-infused liquid caramel with dried figs and dates floating around in it. A tinge of dry spice and boozy heat tickled the tongue, but overall this was as smooth as a pair of recently shorn testicles. Nicely done, fellas! We also felt it necessary to eat before the show, and we each scarfed down a tasty black bean burger with goat cheese, roasted red pepper hummus, and avocado. Yummy!

And with that, it was time to head over to the Keswick Theater for three hours of some of the craziest, most technically complex, and eclectic music you'd ever want to hear under one roof. Dweezil and his band were on fire, slamming through more than two dozen of "choice cuts" from his dad's unmatched catalog of more than 100 albums. Frank was right. Music IS the best... but beer is definitely a close second for me. Thanks for reading! 

Until next time...

On the verge of 44: Part 2

Back at the cabin on Saturday night, we broke open the remainder of the bottles I brought along to share. Up first was an unlabeled 750mL bottle that was given to me by Mike Hiller, head brewer at Strangeways in Richmond, VA. Mike was the owner and brewer of the now defunct Bavarian Barbarian Brewing Co. in Williamsport. I should say it was "left" for me because unfortunately we weren't able to connect when we swung by for a visit on the way home from our Drinksgiving trip to VA Beach back in November of last year. I'd forgotten what was inside the bottle, so I figured why not crack it open and see what it might be? After a few sips, we unanimously determined the mystery beer was in fact a Belgian-style Tripel based on its flavor profile. Upon perusing Untappd for Tripels brewed by Strangeways, we deduced that it was likely a beer called The Burton Threshold. I enjoy me a well-made Tripel, and this one did not disappoint.

Up next was another beer from Allagash called Émile. Aged in red wine foeders with Lactobacillus and Pediococcus (types of bacteria introduced to coax "funky" flavors), this delicate beer boasted a vinous, grape skin-like flavor with mild tartness and traces of oak and vanilla. Keeping things going with "big beers," Bourbon Barrel-Aged Painless from Ocelot was on cue. Another gift from a brewer during my previous birthday trip with D&C and fellow Team D(r)INKers James and Lisa (aka the Yoobergs), this pitch black Russian Imperial Stout aged in Heaven Hills bourbon barrels for eight months was definitely no slouch. Ripples of vanilla and toasted coconut mingled with dark roasted malt, coffee and chocolate notes with a hint of earthy leather and tobacco. It's everything you could want in a barrel-aged RIS!

After the enjoyable BA Painless, we were starting to feel no pain. Deuane swung by Tröegs and picked up some bottles of the recently released Splinter Series beer, Blackberry Tizzy, which I'd been anticipating since first tasting it right from the cellar before it was finished. Similar to Freaky Peach but with blackberries instead of peaches (plus brown sugar and vanilla beans), this complex, fruity, earthy, boozy treat is reminiscent of blackberry bourbon sauce drizzled over French vanilla ice cream.

We ended the evening with an ancient bottle of Victory Old Horizontal from 2005. This uber-aged version was much more enjoyable than the 2015 vintage we'd shared the previous evening. I would have thought it would be the other way around! With only slight oxidation, thirteen years in the cellar was kind to this one. It still mustered up plenty of pleasant boozy caramel-candy goodness with a tinge of dark candied stone fruit and toffee. And with that, folks, I was laid out. They don't call it Old Horizontal for nuthin'! Stick a fork in me. It's time for bed!

The next morning after breakfast (turkey bacon, eggs, English muffins and fried potatoes courtesy of Deuane), we decided to drive separately into Frederick, MD, to hit a few breweries before heading back home. On the agenda were a pair of familiar places and one new-to-us brewery. First up was Rockwell, one of the familiar ones. We'd first visited back in June of last year on the way home from the Iron Maiden concert in Virginia. While I seemed to remember Rockwell more by its beer names (many featuring puns or references to rock music songs) than the actual beers themselves, I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of the brews this time around.

Rockwell's figurative "beer jukebox."

First on the agenda was Wicked Gangnam, a hazy NE-style IPA described as Rockwell's "Olympic Brew" due to its use of a variety of international hops, in this case Southern Cross, Galaxy, and Mandarina Bavaria. Truth be told, I had no idea what "wicked gangnam" meant, and I soon discovered why. Gangnam Style is the name of pop song by South Korean musical artist Psy. The phrase can also refer to his massively viral music video and the famous, much-imitated dance performed in it. So there's your answer: modern pop music. You know what I say to that? FUCK THAT NOISE! Obscure (to me, anyway) reference aside, this beer went down way to smoothly. I could have had a second, but I was eyeing up another IPA on the menu (actually a DIPA) called Crucial Velocity. This big, unfiltered, unrefined beer is dry-hopped with Enigma, Mosaic and Cascade for a juicy blast of tropical and citrus fruit. It's also named after a Clutch song (another one I had to look up). (My buddy Sayten would have gotten the reference. R.I.P. buddy.)

Alas, our visit to Rockwell got me thinking music, which ultimately led to vinyl (my other addiction). I finished up my second beer beer ahead of the rest of the group and decided to go off on a little tangent. My trusty Vinyl District app informed me I was in the vicinity of a cool-sounding record store called Rock & Roll Graveyard. I always have to check out at least one local record shop when we travel to get my fix. Plus it offers a slight break in my daily drinking schedule, which is more than welcome... especially when I'm driving! So, I made a little detour and picked up some gems including an original pressing of the debut Nazz record (Todd Rundgren's original "garage" band, for lack of a better term) and a Devo album I didn't have, among a few others.

After a bit of digging, I reconvened with the group over at nearby Attaboy, the other familiar brewery on the agenda for the day. Since I spent a bit more time at the record store than I had anticipated, this was a one-and-done stop for me. I also had to refuel, and luckily there was a great food truck - Boxcar Burgers - offering a few vegetarian burger options. Brewslut and I ordered both of the veggie burgers plus a box of fries and shared, and both were bangin', especially the black bean burger!

Outside Attaboy Beer (courtesy of Google images).

After perusing the beer menu, I settled on Galaxy Maid, Attaboy's flagship hazy NE-style IPA. By now I'll bet you're thinking, "Man, for someone who bitches about the inordinate amount of hazy IPAs, he sure as fuck orders enough of them!" Well, in this instance, I've had the luxury of having already tried this beer during our first visit... and it was a damn fine beer! Soft and only moderately bitter, this beer features a nice smack of grapefruit. It's no wonder why this beer is its flagship.

Meanwhile, it was hard to drag Deuane away from his sporting event, so the rest of us shipped off to our next stop while he caught up on the second half of the game. I would have liked another beer, but we still had to drive home to PA, which was about an hour-and-forty-five minute drive from Frederick.

Outside Frederick's Monocacy Brewing Company.

I decided to make up for lost time at Attaboy by going with a sampler flight at our final stop of the trip, Monocacy Brewing Company. Several of the beers were part of its "Blank Slate" series, or experimental beer series a la Scratch. It was great to see lots of unusual offerings as well as about five flagships. 

Here's the run-down:

• Blank Slate #60: OATomatic Pale Ale - brewed with flaked oats and hopped with Meridian (U.S.) and Summer (Australia) for a smooth, fruity flavor.
• Blank Slate #59: Violent Delights - Triple IPA brewed with oats and spelt and hopped with Huell Melon, Mosaic, Calypso and Denali. Brewslut was quick to recognize the name of the beer as a reference to Romeo and Juliet. 
• Mic'd Up Mango - mango puree-infused hoppy IPA. This looked identical to a glass of orange juice. It had a nice bitter, pithy almost peppery finish amidst tons of mango juiciness. 
• Brewtus - This imperial coffee stout was probably my favorite of the bunch. Carolyn concurred. 
• Blank Slate #57: Ashen Cold - smoked lager brewed with applewood smoked malt and a variety of specialty malts. I was ready to sing some campfire chants after this one!
• Radiance - shared this juicy, citrus-forward DIPA with Brewslut. This, I was informed, was Monocacy's most popular beer, so I had to try it. 

Pleeps posing at Monocacy.

All in all, we enjoyed each of the three breweries quite a bit. Rockwell seemed to have upped its ante since our last visit, Attaboy was solid as ever, and we were pretty impressed overall with Monocacy and its variety of solid beers across the board. The staff there were pretty entertaining as well... right Deuane? Frederick is only a stone's throw away from Central PA, and offers a convenient beer day trip for those interested in checking out some cool new places without having to drive too far or spend the night.

Pleeps gettin' tipsy with the tips.

So there you have it! Another birthday weekend soaked in beer. Next year, we'll see if I can get spun like a record as I turn 45 and start the downhill tumble toward the half century mark. Until next time...